7/18/14 My Most Embarrassing Admission Turned Good?
Throughout the history of this blog I've tried to be as honest as possible about my condition, my mood, my thoughts, my attitude, you name it. I've admitted a lot of things on here that might be in the TMI (Too Much Information) category, but I've always left out one detail that I felt was a little too embarrassing to write about. So here it is....I've been wearing a diaper to bed for about 4 or 5 years (I guess I am supposed to say absorbent undergarment, but a spade is a spade is a spade). Lots of emasculating things come along with my MS diagnosis. As if losing my ability to walk properly wasn't bad enough, I had my heart out of rhythm, the headaches, the brain fog, the urinary issues I wrote about, the bowels, and of course, the nighttime wee wee.
So yes, I was a bedwetter too. And quite a good one. I'd fall asleep on the couch and wake up to a nice round patch on the front of my shorts, clean up and go to bed, then wake up with the sheets soaked. After about 10 times of that happening, I finally agreed to wear a diaper/undergarment so at least I kept it contained and no extra sheet washing was required. What I wife I have to have dealt with that wonderful morning treat.
The good news is, it seems to have gone away. As I began to lose weight (260 as of today, so about 55 lbs gone so far), put my heart back into rhythm (almost 9 months of sinus now or 25 million beats), eliminate the brain headache and fog issues (almost a year now), and generally improve my overall health, I feel like I just got a new reason to believe I remain on the mend. This one has to be a legit improvement from a neurological standpoint. I stopped losing control of my bladder while sleeping. Wow. Instead of whizzing all over the bed and waking up from feeling it on my leg, now I wake up when it's still inside and my body taps me on the shoulder and says "Hey Mike, you gotta go.....might want to wake up and use the toilet." A groggy stumble to the bathroom has proven much better than a fully awake swearing session about soaked sheets and sleeping rest of the night on a towel or the floor. Ahhhh, the joys of MS. Sleep is good. Dry sleep is better.
Also, no sooner than that happened, I have also noticed some real improvement in my legs. Not sure how to describe this one as I'm certainly not fixed, but there is some initial trigger stability I've felt lately, despite it being 107 degrees here. It's very slight and may just be a fluctuation, but I'd thought I'd report this too in case it turns out to be the start of another neurological re-connect.